Please Excuse Me While I Rant...

4 years ago today, my Daddy was murdered. By a drunk. Please, people, if you don't have sense enough to know when to stop, then don't start. And for Heaven's sake, whatever you do, don't drive. Seriously. I try not to be angry. But some days it just doesn't work. Today is one of those days. I am angry, and I have every right to be angry. 4 years ago today, a woman stole my father's life by being stupid. By drinking so much, her blood alcohol level should have killed her. By getting in a truck and driving so fast, the cops couldn't catch up with her. By being so drunk, she didn't know she was driving the wrong direction on a divided highway. By driving when she didn't have a driver's license to begin with. (Yes, it had already been revoked for her having multiple DWI's.) She took his life. She took my Daddy, and my boys' Papaw. And she lived. Fair? Hardly. So yes, I am angry. But I am also sad. Sad because the world lost an amazingly creative and talented man 4 years ago. Sad for what my youngest son has never known. (I was pregnant with him at the time.) Sad for what my oldest son knew and has had taken away from him. Sad because no matter how old I get, I will always be my Daddy's girl, I will always miss him, and I will never get him back as long as I remain on this earth.

So today, like every other day, I have to pull myself up. Draw my strength from the One who knows why. Put on a smile. Teach my boys how to persevere. Find a way to give thanks. Remember how to praise in the midst of the storm.




I was sure by now,God, that You would have reached down
and wiped our tears away,
stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
and it's still raining
as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain,
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away.

Chorus:
And I'll praise you in this storm
and I will lift my hands
for You are who You are
no matter where I am
and every tear I've cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
and though my heart is torn
I will praise You in this storm

I remember when I stumbled in the wind
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on
if I can't find You
and as the thunder rolls
I barely hear You whisper through the rain
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
the God who gives and takes away

Chorus

I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth
I lift my eyes onto the hills
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth

Chorus

by: Casting Crowns